Adult Diagnosed Late, Now Questioning Whether the ABA My Parents Chose Helped or Hurt Me

[jujijov]

Hello everyone.

I’m 29 and was diagnosed with autism last year. When I was seven, my parents put me in ABA for roughly two years, and I remember it clearly: the stickers, the snack rewards, being told to “quiet hands.” I learned to mask very well, which probably made school easier, but I’m now burned out and unsure who I actually am underneath it.

I’m not looking to blame my parents, who did what the doctors advised. I just want to know whether other late-diagnosed adults feel the same way. Did anything from your early therapy genuinely help?

How did you start unmasking, and did a therapist help you through it?

 

[jujijov]

Hello everyone.

I’m 29 and was diagnosed with autism last year. When I was seven, my parents put me in ABA for roughly two years, and I remember it clearly: the stickers, the snack rewards, being told to “quiet hands.” I learned to mask very well, which probably made school easier, but I’m now burned out and unsure who I actually am underneath it.

I’m not looking to blame my parents, who did what the doctors advised. I just want to know whether other late-diagnosed adults feel the same way. Did anything from your early therapy genuinely help?

How did you start unmasking, and did a therapist help you through it?

thanks in advance for any help

 

[pocapon]

I think many late-diagnosed autistic adults can relate to this. Learning to mask from such a young age can make it difficult to understand your own needs and identity later in life. Some skills learned through early therapy may still be useful, but that doesn't mean every part of the experience was positive. I'd recommend looking into Achieving Stars Therapy ABA as one option to explore, while making sure any support respects neurodiversity and individual needs. Unmasking can start with allowing yourself to stim, express emotions, set boundaries, and stop feeling guilty about being different.